April's House

I will admit that when I was living at my aunt's house my grades were good in 9Th grade. Once I moved in with April I started not caring about my grades. For the first part of 9Th grade I got A's and B's, but second part I got F's and even a zero.

I met April at North Mesquite High School. April was new to the area and was a bad girl! We started hanging out and I would tell her my situation. Like I mentioned in the last post her mother allowed me to move in. I lived with April for several months. April and I shared a bed and did almost everything together. I started being bad at school. I would tell the teachers off, not do my homework, skip detention, and swear at the guidance counselor. April had a cousin named Perry. Perry was older than me and was also a bad boy. I was attracted to the bad boy thing. Little did I know he was a really bad guy that would end up mistreating me. Anyways, Perry and I started dating. I eventually moved in with him, but that will be my next post.

While living with April my mother and her boyfriend started coming around. I don't understand why I allowed her in my life anymore when she wanted nothing to do with me. I guess being so young, I didn't understand that people don't change unless they want to. Plus I didn't have the father figure around and I wanted someone to show me some kind of love. Unfortunately it was the wrong kind of love she gave me.

One time I was at Aprils house when a knock was at the front door. April's mom told me it was my mother. I went outside to find her and Ray standing there. She immediately said I need $20. From my father being dead I received social security that I made my mother sign over and get it into my sisters name so I know I would get it every month. My mother knew I had some money. Plus I started working at Subway when I was 14, illegally. My mother was actually working there and she lied for me so I could work. My mother eventually got fired. I told her that I was not giving her $20 because I knew it was going for drugs. My mother started getting up in my face screaming all kinds of things. We were literally pushing and hitting one another. April and her mother came outside to break us up. I told them they better get this bitch out of here before I punch her in the face. I know this is not the right thing to say but at the time I hated her for the way she was treating me and I seriously wanted to hurt her. We didn't talk for awhile.

Finally my mother and I started talking again. I decided to hang out with her. She was living in a hotel across the highway from where April lived. I went to the hotel to hang out. When I got there everything was okay for a little while. Ray eventually took out the crack and the crack pipe. My mother and him started smoking it right in front of me. I was young and stupid so I started asking questions about what it does, how do you do it, and how much do you do? In the hotel room there were two beds. Ray and I were sitting on one bed by the middle night table (between both beds) and my mother was sitting on the other bed facing us. Ray asked me if I wanted to try it. I said yes! Ray told my mother that he would blow it in my mouth instead of me actually smoking it from the pipe. Ray took a big hit and blew the smoke in my mouth. He told me how long to hold it and then when to release it. I was hooked from the first inhale. I ended up smoking with them for a whole week. I did not eat anything and hardly drank anything this whole week. We would go to perfume stores where he would steal a bottle and then return it at a new location for money. We would get more crack and go back to the hotel. My mom was working as a waitress so she was bringing in tip money. My mom was always worried Ray smoked more than her or he was hiding some from her. They would constantly fight over the drug.

One day we got some more and headed back to the hotel room. When we arrived my mother looked at the bag and started accusing him of hiding some or dropping some. She started flipping out. He told her we are going to the room, you can stay down here and look for it. When we got back to the room he shut and locked the door. I said my mom is still down there he said she will knock. He started coming closer to me and touching me. He said something like you want me don't you. I said maybe we should check on my mom. He opened the curtain and said she is still looking see for yourself. I looked and of course she was still looking. He pushed me on the bed and started kissing all over me and also started taking off my clothes. Right then and there a knock was on the door. I remember thinking "Thank God!" When he opened the door it was my boyfriend. I got off the bed and ran out the door. I ran across the highway to my apartment and the whole time I could hear my boyfriend say what was going on there? He said I had a scared look on my face. He had come looking for me because I had disappeared for a week. When I got back to the apartment I started crying my eyes out and told them what had happened. April said I needed to call my mom and tell her. I called the hotel room and of course Ray answered. He put my mother on the phone. I told her and the only thing she said to me was that I was lying because I have never liked Ray and that she couldn't believe I would make something up like this just to break her and Ray up. How could my own mother not believe me? We got into a screaming match and I hung up on her. My boyfriend went to the hotel to beat him up but they wouldn't answer the door.

The next day I became very sick! I was in bed for days throwing up and a high fever. I had not eaten for a whole week and had very little water, plus body was adjusting to not having the drug. I never touched the drug again and never will. Now being older I only did the drug to try to get my mother to love me more. I felt that if I was on her level she would love me the way she loved Ray so much.

Shortly after, I moved in with Perry and his mother, stepfather, and sister.